by Joey | Mar 3, 2016 | Throwback
This week has been one of those that I haven’t been able to keep track of what day it is. And unfortunately, I’ve kept thinking it’s a day later than it is. There’s nothing worse than leaving work on a Tuesday thinking it was Wednesday all day.
I knew it would happen eventually–I’m running full speed in a million different directions, but you guys? I am burnt out. I’ve never been one to love travel (I much prefer Netflix in my living room–travel usually stresses me out), but I have never craved a cottage in the woods more.
Which got me thinking. The last true vacation J and I took together was our honeymoon. Six years ago.
Lately, every time we travel it’s for an event. A wedding. A funeral. Some jam-packed-family-filled weekend that we have to squirrel vacation time away for. Don’t get me wrong, those are fun (not the funeral, obviously). But they are not vacations. They all provide some level of stress and drama.
As much as I’d love some tropical escape with all you can drink cocktails and unlimited sunshine, it just isn’t a realistic option at this point. They’re expensive and require a lot of planning. Finding an entire week to take off of work just seems impossible to me.
But I’ve been sitting here for way too long staring at my jam-packed calendar thinking I just need to get away. I’d love some secluded cabin in the woods and a weekend without any obligations. It’s tough to find the time. It’s tough to coordinate schedules. But I think at this point, it’s more necessary than not.
We’re within driving distance of some amazing places. Blowing Rock, Charleston, Athens just to name a few. I’m so tempted to hop onto AirBNB, snag some cozy little place, and take off running.
This feeling let’s me know one things: we’re doing it wrong. One of my closest friends is always jet-setting here and taking off there. She and her husband sit at the beginning of the year and they plan out their travel. Turns out–that’s pretty normal. Who knew.
I’ve learned lately that if it’s not on my calendar, it’s a pipe dream. I schedule in catch up calls with friends and when to get my oil changed. So why aren’t I scheduling in R&R?
Okay.
I get it now.
How do you guys handle your travel? Do you wait until you’re burnt out and plan an emergency getaway? Or are you more like
Kim (sorry, calling you out friend :)) and plan out your vacations strategically, ensuring you always have something to look forward to?
I remember in college my best friend and I would live and die for our little trips away. We’d plan something fun (on a built in break–I miss those) and looking forward to it would make everything else feel easier.
I think we had the right idea back then.
All this to say, I’m tired. And burnt out. And I need a little break. So if you see a little brunette sitting in the corner of the Starbucks on Park with a list of AirBNB rentals up on her computer, say hi. Because that’s totally me right now.
by Joey | Mar 2, 2016 | Throwback
People think bloggers sit down at their computers for 10 minutes, spit out some mumbo jumbo, hit publish and that’s the end of that story.
Ha.
We wish, right?
Right.
You know it, and I know it. Running any kind of remotely successful blog takes a ton of freaking work. And if you work a day job, it can all feel impossible. I get it, I’d love to sit at my computer all day sharing my hard work on my various social media accounts, too. But I’m no where near my computer during my work day. And I’m lucky if I get a second here or there to chat on twitter (I try).
But take it from me, if you want to keep your day job, you probably shouldn’t be caught hanging out on Twitter all day. You need that health insurance, am I right?
I was guilty of working really hard on a post, scheduling it to go live, and solely relying on the
one tweet that Bloglovin’ so kindly pumps out for me
at 5AM and wondering why no one was reading my blog
. That’s no way to show your hard work love. It’s just not.
That’s when I found Buffer. I’d checked into it years ago–but it seemed overwhelming and I gave up. But now that I’ve got it figured out, I’ll share my tricks with you!
Buffer.com allows you to schedule up to 10 tweets at a time for
free. I used the free version for a while, but I found that 10 tweets just wasn’t enough. For $10/month (the Awesome Plan), you can manage 10 different social media accounts, and schedule up to 100 posts at one time.
NOTE: there are several features of Buffer that I don’t mess with yet. It has some pretty cool options, but for today, I’m just going to share with you exactly how I use it.
Alright.
Let’s get to it.
1. Write a stellar blog post.
I’d love to tell you that I always have my content written the weekend before. That’s not always the case. We all have the best intentions, but I can be found writing a blog post the night before it’s meant to be published. Even if that’s you, ferociously writing trying to meet your own deadline, Buffer is still for you.
2. Snatch the Permalink
This looks complicated, it’s not. On the right sidebar, click on permalink. You can customize this if you want, I rarely do. I know for SEO purposes this can be important, but I’m not that fancy. I simply highlight and copy the link it provides.
3. Shorten the link
This isn’t 100% necessary, no. But I go to
Bitly.com to shorten the link. This helps tremendously with twitter. I struggle with the character count, friends.
Are any of you surprised? No.
4. Write Your Tweet.
Go to
buffer.com. Once you have an account, it’ll bring you right to your dashboard where you can select which account you want to schedule posts for. I typically opt to pull lines straight out of my blog post to use as tweets. As of right now, I really only use Buffer for twitter. I’d like to start using it for Facebook, but you all know how much I hate Facebook, so I haven’t really made figuring that part out a priority. Once you’ve written your tweet, click on
Add to queue and select SCHEDULE POST.
5. Select Date & Time
People who are more successful than me will tell you that there are optimal times to post for more engagement, etc. And yes, that’s true. I just don’t care enough to know what they are. The good news is, Buffer will analyze your account and suggest when you should post. If you want to be more successful than me, listen to Buffer. I stick with the every other hour thing starting at 7AM. I don’t want my account to be nothing but scheduled promotional tweets. I make an effort to pop in on the opposite hours with real, live, personal chatty content. Once you’re done, select SCHEDULE under the time.
Bada bing, bada boom.
You’re done.
If I can make one recommendation, life will feel a lot more under control if you go ahead and schedule your tweets as soon as you’re done writing your blog post and scheduling it. I look at it as my way of “closing the books” on that one post before moving on to another.
Once my post is written, scheduled to go live, and I have all my social media scheduled out, I add the post to my blog post inventory spreadsheet. Stay tuned for next week to find out how I save $50/month and created my own way to promote posts from my archives!
by Joey | Mar 1, 2016 | Throwback
The other day while I was running, Stand By You by Rachel Platton came on Pandora. I’ve heard it a hundred times before but barely listened to it. It’s catchy enough though it’s not really my cup of tea. After that run, I went home and bought the song on iTunes.
I had to stop myself from blasting it on repeat waiting for the husband to get home and screaming this is our new song at him when he walked through the door.
I think it’s the exact opposite of what is wrong with love and marriage these days. Because the truth is, we all expect our partners to always be the people we fell in love with but we don’t hold ourselves to that same standard.
When we are less than our best, we expect our partners to love us through it, to support us even when we’re a little bit crazy. But the second they stumble off the path to success, we get that irrational I can’t love someone like this feeling. I deserve better than this. They’re better than this. I can’t do this.
It’s not about you. It’s not about you at all. Sure, it’s hard for you to love someone through their storm. That’s never easy. But when you start to make it about you, you’ve already failed. You’ve already given up on them. And they need you. That’s why they picked you.
God designed us to be strong even when we feel like we can’t be. And sometimes that means being strong for someone else when they can’t be. That’s called marriage.
It’s easy to want to walk away when things aren’t easy. Duh. But you picked this person for life, for better or worse. It’s easy to see the good on that sunny day in your white dress. If it were easy to love someone through their storm, you wouldn’t have to make that promise in front of God and everyone who loves you, asking them to hold you accountable.
It’s when you finally stop thinking about yourself, about how all of this is affecting you that you experience real love. When you can sit down next to the person you love, even when they’ve forgotten who that person is, take their hand and give them your wings.
Because sometimes you have to be strong enough for the both of you. It doesn’t seem fair. It’s never easy. But it’s always worth it. Because let me tell you, when you come out the other side still holding hands? That’s when you experience the true magic of marriage.
And more miraculously so, they’ll do the same for you. They’ll love you when you’re unlovable. But it takes work and commitment and, gasp, sometimes putting yourself second.
It’s your job to always see the best in them, especially when they can’t. Because we all get a little lost sometimes. And that’s okay. That’s why we are partners. One takes the wheel, the other navigates. That’s just the way it works.
by Joey | Feb 25, 2016 | Throwback
When my Camry died, I was knee deep in Yeah, Maybe revisions on a computer that was 7 years old and barely functioning. Everyone was telling me I needed to get a car. I decided it was more important to get a new computer.
So after Yeah, Maybe was published (that’s right, you guys, I published the book using a computer that would crash on me every 20 minutes–stop making excuses), I rewarded myself with a brand new Macbook Pro. A huge investment for an unemployed writer, but it seemed more useful to me at the time than a new car. I worked from home. My husband’s job was less than a mile from our house. Do you see what I mean?
Overtime, a car seemed a little more necessary. My dad wasn’t driving much anymore, so my mom very kindly lent me hers. It served its purpose nicely. I mostly used it to travel to their house–something that was hugely necessary during The Great Tree Fight of 2014.
But then the rug got pulled out from under us. We didn’t expect to leave Campbell. We had no intentions of leaving our little (very inexpensive) house. Meaning we had no plan. Moves are expensive, especially when one of us hadn’t exactly been making a stable income for two years.
We entered 2015 scared silly. We had no money. No plan. No prospects. Nothing. We relied heavily on God and family. We trusted our instincts which took us to Charlotte. We picked an apartment less than two miles from my job, where a car would be provided while I was at work. I had it all worked out, I’d get a bike and uber to work when the weather was bad.
Don’t be ridiculous, my parents said. The car is just sitting in the driveway. Thank you.
The year continued. We got knocked down a couple times. We made mistakes. We failed. We started the year in last place and kept falling behind. Y’all. Shit. Was. Hard.
“The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly.”
-T. Roosevelt
We stayed the course. We stopped, backed up, tried again. We kept pushing forward. We stood up, face covered in mud, streaked by tears, and kept going.
I drove my mom’s car for the entirety of 2015: accepting the help that was offered, something my pride was allergic to. But I couldn’t do it alone. There’s nothing more sobering than looking at your life and realizing you can’t save yourself.
So when I was sitting in that dealership signing my life away a couple weeks ago, it was a reality check. A life checkup, check in.
Life is hard, friends. And you’re going to hear no probably more than you’ll hear yes. That doesn’t mean stop. That doesn’t mean quit. It means try again.
Life isn’t always this obvious, the glaring differences already between 2015 and 2016 are hard not to see. But at some point, you’re going to be going through something hard. That’s the way it goes, unfortunately.
Work hard.
Don’t stop.
Keep going.
It gets better.
You’ll earn better.
This morning, I got into my little car and drove to Starbucks to write this post on the computer that at one time I needed more than a car. Then I packed up my stuff, got back into my car, and drove to work; the job that saved our 2015.
Keep going.
You’re doing okay.
by Joey | Feb 24, 2016 | Throwback
I’m all for anything that makes life seem a little easier these days. In the last 12 months, my life has done a full 180, and I’ll be honest in saying that 90% of the time it all feels like too much.
I adored my Fitbit Flex. I wore it religiously. I raved about it. And the truth is, I still love the Fitbit franchise. But a few months before Christmas, I started to finally feel what the Flex was lacking. I needed a screen. I needed a watch. And life would be that much easier if I could screen calls from my wrist. So the Charge HR went right onto my Christmas list.
And I got it.
And I loved it.
Except…
Then I found myself thinking how much easier life would be if I could screen my texts from my wrist. My day job does not involve a desk. And communication is the #1 priority at my job. Things change on a dime. My tasks and duties are communicated through text. Schedules change on a whim. I just found myself needing something…more.
Things I was concerned about:
- As “plugged in” as I might seem, I take disconnection seriously. I don’t like being glued to my devices. I was worried it would make me feel too connected.
- The size/weight/appearance. I’m extremely picky about wearing stuff on my wrists. I’ve always found bracelets/watches/etc uncomfortable. The Fitbit franchise worked wonderfully for me because they are perfectly designed to be lightweight. I wasn’t sure the Apple Watch would be.
- Is it even really that necessary? It’s a pretty sizable investment (especially when you actually end up paying $1000 at the end of the day–but hey, that was just me), and I was pretty convinced it was another Apple marketing ploy making me believe I just had to have it.
The Truth:
Plugged In? Yes. You’re plugged in. But for some bizarre reason, I find it actually relieving. The text “glance” feature has saved everything for me. I am always in the middle of doing something at work–so getting the little tap and being able to glance at the text (the whole text) from my wrist without 1) showing the read receipt and 2) stopping what I’m doing has been crucial for me. It allows for me to make an educated decision about the urgency of the text. If it’s conversational, I’ll get to it. If it’s a task coming in from my bosses, I’m able to select a quick “ok” (or any other appropriate reply) from the pre-loaded responses.
- NOTE: I do not have all of the alerts set up. That would drive me absolutely insane. The only notifications I get “tapped” for are texts and calendar events that I have reminders set up for.
Size/Weight/Appearance. Turns out this was a total nonissue for me. It’s very lightweight and perfectly designed to the point that a lot of times I forget I’m wearing it until I get tapped. I’m a person that cares much more about functionality and comfort in my wardrobe to care if it “looks” cool, but I like the way it looks. I have the rose gold & lavender one, and I’m in love.
Is It Really Even Necessary? No. This is a luxury item. But it has proven itself as seriously important in my world. WHY? Well, I’ll tell yah.
How I Use It:
I use it very simplistically. I know I haven’t even BEGUN to tap into all the fancy features. But it serves my needs this way without leaving me feeling overwhelmed. Instead, it feels like the assistant I’ve always needed.
- Watch: Because, well, duh. Everything at my day job is time sensitive. I have pick ups and drop offs sprinkled throughout my busy day. I have set, repeating alarms, that remind me when it’s time to stop what I’m doing to go pick up a kid. Trust me, it’s easy for time to get away from you, and kids get pretty pissed if you forget to pick them up
- Calendar: Did you hear me? Let me repeat it. CALENDAR!!! I’ve admitted more than once that I’ve become heavily reliant on my iCal. I absolutely love that I can see my next appointment on my watch face (these are customizable, so you don’t HAVE to see them, but this is the #1 feature that makes my life so much easier). It lets me me know where I need to be next, when, what I need to do/bring/have. I’m telling you–this watch is the assistant I’ve always needed.
- Notifications. I don’t have my phone on me 99% of the time. Aside from allowing me to glance at my texts (which prevents me from having to STOP what I’m doing to make sure the text that comes through isn’t important), it also allows me to see if it’s another stupid google website telemarketer calling or if it’s my Mom. Again, it helps prevent me from stopping what I’m doing to check my phone. I love this.
- Fitness Tracker. I haven’t tapped into this one as much as I’d like–but it DOES have a ton of options for tracking fitness. As a general, daily activity tracker, it does pretty well. There’s a lag when you go to check your heart rate (unlike the Charge HR), and it’s harder to hit your 10,000 steps. I need to research this further, but I’m fairly certain the Apple Watch is a more accurate pedometer. I consistently get somewhere between 6 and 7 thousand steps daily (without working out) when I used to track easily 11,000 or more with the Fitbit. I’ve noticed the watch does not count my hand motions as “steps.” So when I sweep the floor, I’m not racking up a gazillion steps.
- NOTE: I do miss the social network of the fitbit community. I find that I’m less motivated to track my exercise because why bother? I found that having “friends” on Fitbit and the challenges to be extremely motivating. Perhaps Apple will add this in the future?
There are so many features that I’m not even going to attempt to highlight otherwise this post would be forever long. I watched a lot of youtube videos before purchasing and then after for tips and tricks.
I’ve spent $100 (total cost without the Charge HR return would have been $250) on worse, less useful things. I think $250 is a fair price for the product for what the simplistic way I use it. I was very worried knowing how simplistic I am that it would feel like too much money. I wouldn’t pay the $350 for a watch and calendar (or maybe I would…) but if you’re going to tap into the other million features that I haven’t listed, I would say it’s totally worth it.
NOTE: I have the Apple Watch Sport. The hardware (you know, the watch face) is the same technology across the board. The higher priced watches are simply for the band. My recommendation would be to purchase the sport edition (hello, cheaper) and then invest in a new band (because they’re interchangeable, hella awesome) at a later date, or as you feel it necessary.
*this is not a sponsored post, but how could would it be if it was? I’m not cool enough to get Apple’s attention.
