by Joey | Jun 19, 2015 | Throwback
WnW Spring Lake Limited Edition: Wear Skinny Jeans
…except don’t.
Because it’s 100 degrees outside.
PS…this polish is a pretty close dupe for Essie Bikini So Teeny that actually has a dream formula and my favorite wide brush. Just thought you’d like to know.
Things are going pretty well, actually. I was seriously hesitant for summer hours because I was unsure of how I would balance everything–but it’s working out much better than I could have anticipated.
When I got to work on Monday, the oldest surprised me with an office space. It was honestly the sweetest thing ever, and I’m much more productive in that little corner in the few minutes I get here and there throughout the day than I have been since we moved here. I’m excited for what’s to come.
I’m hesitant to admit this on le’blog just because what if I crash and burn but here goes nothing. I’m on deadline, people. Six weeks. In six weeks there will be another book. A rough draft, but a book nonetheless. It’s go time. And I couldn’t be more excited!
Everything just feels right. Things are happening and I still have to pinch myself every now and again that we’re actually here. I don’t know if I ever mentioned that I threw my back out last week. J and I spent the entire weekend on the couch watching OITNB–but every so often I’d drift in and out of sleep (thank you, muscle relaxers)–and I kept waking up in a haze, kind of unsure of where I was.
And for some reason, my default setting is still Buies Creek. In my head, I still identify those empty streets and open pastures as “home.” And while I don’t miss it, it’s still a part of who we are and what we’ve become. And it’s an odd feeling when I suddenly remember that no…we’re here. We’re in Charlotte living the life we have now. A good feeling, but odd nonetheless.
It just goes to show you, people, that you can have everything all planned out. You can have big dreams, ideas, and plans and yet you can still end up somewhere completely different doing something so off the mark and still be happy.
by Joey | Jun 18, 2015 | Throwback
Life moves quickly.
And it’s easy for us to get so caught up in our insecurities to remember that we are enough.
That we are capable.
So I just wanted to take a second
to remind you of that today.
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by Joey | Jun 17, 2015 | Throwback
So like the rest of the world, I’m obsessed. Okay, no. We’re obsessed. J and I were camped out on the couch all weekend long binging. I’m ashamed to say we watched the entire third season in just under 36 hours. Now before you click out thinking you don’t want to see any spoilers, I’ll spare you. This post is about something different.
This post is about why the concept of Orange is the New Black scares me.
I read the book when it first came out. And while I was intrigued by the story, the book itself bored me. I don’t think it focused on the right parts and that she didn’t capitalize on the actual story she had to tell. But that’s neither here nor there. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know that OITNB is based off of a true story.
Piper Kerman’s story, to be exact. And the details are a little fuzzy for me (it’s been a while since I read the book which was the actual story), but from what I understand she got locked up for a crime she “committed” (I use that word loosely) ten years earlier when she was young and stupid.
Since the crime, she went on to live a relatively normal life. A boring life, even. She was just a normal, regular woman with a relatively boring past with a bump of shady mixed in.
And then she ended up in prison.
And here’s the part that scares me. I think we’re all pretty responsible people with an understanding of our expectations in life. Of ourselves and of what we want our lives to be like. But we’ve all been young and stupid before. Maybe not that stupid, but stupid enough. And it’s a little alarming to me how one tiny blip on our radars could come back to haunt us.
Now, I’ve never carried drug money or murdered anyone, but I’ve had some moments in my past that I’d rather not relive. I have some things that I look back on and think I’m not that person. But regardless, I still did those things. But I don’t let them define me. (And before anyone starts thinking I’m some badass, I’m not. We’re talking petty crap decisions here).
But it’s things like OITNB that brings our responsibility of being functioning adults into laser sharp focus. We are free to do what we please and make any decisions we feel like making. And on a regular basis, our decisions seem small. What drink to order at Starbucks. Should I take the express way or surface streets to work? Should I pay this bill online or send in a check?
But every so often, a big decision bubbles up and in the heat of a moment you have to decide. And what if the decision you made was the wrong one. What if you’re a good person making a poor choice?
We all walk around with these definitions of ourselves floating around in our heads, hoping that our little cloud that follows us has us labeled as A Good Person. But good people do bad things all the time. And what if that one bad decision you made all those years ago when you were young and stupid came back to bite you in the ass? What if it could change the path that you’re currently on? What if it could change your life as you know it?
And the thing is, when we’re young and stupid, I know we don’t quite get the gravity of certain situations. Some of us were lucky enough to never end up in shady situations or mixed up with the wrong batch of people, but what if you weren’t so lucky? What if you were just a normal person mixed up with some bad people? And then you ended up in prison?
So what I’m trying to say is, while I enjoy OITNB, I can’t ever watch it without wondering how I’d fare. How well would I do if I landed in prison so unexpectedly based off a bad decision I made many moons ago?
Well.
I hope I never have to find out.
by Joey | Jun 16, 2015 | Throwback
- Befine Cucumber Facial Mask. So refreshing! The scent is strong but nice. It’s so strong though that it’s still lingering in the ipsy bag even after I pulled it out. I’ve used this once already and it was just so cooling and refreshing. It left my skin feeling so smooth.
- Tre’Stique Aspen Pine Mini Shadow Pencil. Very smooth and creamy formula. The color is a little off from what I’d normally choose for myself, but it does look like it’d add a nice smokey effect to a simple eye look!
- Sephora X Formula in Power Source. I’ve never used an X Formula polish before. The formula was smooth and opaque and the brush was nice. The color is bright. Brighter than I could capture on camera. Perfect for summer.
- Smashbox Photo Finish Primer. I’ve never actually used this product before, but I do religiously use the Monistat Chaffing Gel dupe for it. I used this primer under my tinted moisturizer that usually goes greasy on me in a hot minute on a 100* degree day and my face held up much better than I anticipated. I’m a fan.
- Nuxe Gelee Exfoliation Douce. The scent on this is a little fainter than the mask. It’s got a good amount of grit to it. I imagine it’ll be a pretty great exfoliant. I haven’t actually given it a try yet, but I’m eager to.
I’m happy with this bag, but not as happy as I was with last month’s bag (which I never got around to reviewing). I much prefer make up and hair products over skincare. I’m pretty picky about what I use on my face and while all the brands included in June’s bag are excellent quality–I already use what works for me.
For the record, I absolutely LOVED everything in my May bag except for the lip tint.
Anyway. Here’s a photo of Power Source in it’s full glory!
*this is not a sponsored post. I subscribe to Ipsy and all opinions are my own.
by Joey | Jun 15, 2015 | Throwback
I’m stuck in my tracks. I’m moving forward but at a glacial pace. And not exactly in the direction I was hoping for. And the only person I have to blame is myself.
When my time was my own, I was a master of it. I ceased the opportunities that weren’t even in front of me. I put them in front of myself. I made them happen. And the funny thing is, I still have that power. And so do you. But instead I’ve curled back into myself. I’m complacent and that’s not okay.
I keep telling myself I’m waiting for the right moment. I keep saying I’m waiting for the right inspiration. It’ll come when it’ll come. But the truth is, like with most things, you have to make it the right time.
I never felt more in place or more like myself than when I was tackling the book last year. I woke up with purpose to my days and felt so fulfilled at the end of the day despite the exhaustion. I didn’t allow myself any excuses. I squashed the fear that constantly bubbled up and dove in. I stood on a ledge or two that I needed to be talked off of, but for the most part I knew what I was doing was the right thing.
I am good at my day job. I’ve always been strangely good with kids, but this age group is my place. I didn’t know it but my husband did. And he guided me into this job. It’s all the blessings that I knew it would be. I fit. And it works. It got us out of Buies Creek. It got us into this apartment where life blossomed before my very eyes. It brought a part of me back to life.
But this new life has set me off balance. I’ve taken every excuse and worn them like an armor fighting against the things that scare me. A security blanket.
The funny thing is, I’m a master at doing what I’m told (I’m pretty sure my parents are laughing out there somewhere. har har). Someone says jump, and I do my best to jump higher than they expected. But lately I’ve been having trouble respecting myself in that same way. When you’re at the start of something, it’s hard to identify yourself in a certain way.
Last night I came into the living room and told J I wrote an article for an online magazine and that it was being published today. I’m a writer! I exclaimed and then realized how stupid that sounded. I know, I wrote a whole freaking book. I should know I’m a writer. But this part of me is always something I’ve struggled with. You all know it. And I know it.
I guess there isn’t much point to all of this except to say that I have to think that we are all constantly battling something. Everyone has something right? We put on our brave faces and face the world like we have it all together but behind closed doors the we shrink down in front of the monsters.
