Stuff & Things 9/11

++ Today is always a bitter sweet day.  It’s my sister’s birthday (Happy Birthday Eileen!) but also a day we’ll never forget.  I’d tell you where I was when I heard the news, but I think I’ve told you that a gazillion times.  No matter how much time passes, the day is always chilling.

++  I really appreciate all the support I got from yesterday’s post.  It’s never easy admitting that you’re different.  And in the world of the internet, judgement is easy to come by.  I’m just so glad that I have this little community who just gets me.  Love you girls!

++ Bailey has gotten spoiled.  We’ve been spending a good amount of time with some of the other wives and their dogs lately.  My pup, who is usually content to sleep the day away, has started bugging me throughout the day to play.  I think weekly dog park dates are going to become a thing.

++ Confession: I wash trash tv.  I love collapsing onto the couch, glass of wine in hand ready to eat up all the drama.  Monday was the finale of Bachelor In Paradise.  I won’t give any spoilers in case you’re like me and like the trash but aren’t caught up yet.  But if you do watch and are caught up–what do you think?  Did you see that coming?  Part of me didn’t but part of me did!

++ There’s another away game today.  If I’m being honest, an away game during the week is easier to swallow.  I wouldn’t see J during the week anyway.  Since the last few games have been so crammed together, we’re hoping for some actual down time (do you hear those angels singing?) together this weekend!

++ I made a batch of chicken, a batch of mashed sweet potatoes, and a batch of green beans on Sunday.  That’s what I’ve been surviving on for dinners because let’s be honest.  Who wants to cook for just one?  Not this girl.  It’s never what I want–but it’s healthy and it fills up my belly.

++ The writing has begun.  And it’s ugly, y’all.  Rough drafts are just that…rough.  I have to keep reminding myself that the point is to get the words down, to tell myself the story.

++Along the same lines, writing with a cat in the house?  Not so easy, y’all! hah!  When he isn’t pawing at me to pay him attention or screaming his head off (for not particular reason other than to just be annoying), he’s in my lap.  Uhm?  It’s a little difficult to use both arms to type when he’s laying on one of them! haha!

++One more!  I might get some haters for this one, but anything that causes a lot of hype?  I’m almost immediately turned off to it.  I think it’s my introvert tendencies and it goes along with my hate of crowds.  But movie premiers, iPhone releases, anything where there’s a “mad dash” for something totally stresses me out and makes me want to stay as far away as possible.  With that said, I was all prepared to jump ship from the iPhone in general when I upgrade next (soon!) but I think I’m going to stick with it for only 2 reasons.  1) I have a gift card to apple which would make my phone free and wouldn’t have use for otherwise.  2) I like that iMessages come to my computer messages so I’m able to “text” with my computer.

Why My Marriage Is Untraditional…

Why My Marriage Is Untraditional…

…and I’m okay with it.

via

Every little girl dreams about finding love and getting married.  I was no exception.  But the traditional marriage when the man comes home promptly at 6pm to find a wife in her apron setting dinner on the table doesn’t exist here.

And that’s true.  It was me who woke up this morning, cleaned the dog poop from the yard and mowed the grass.  It was me who tried to fix the agitator in the washing machine before finally breaking down and calling maintenance.  It was me who abandoned the house for 12 plus hours because there was a cockroach in the sink.

I scrounge the fridge for dinner and eat it alone in front of the TV.  I watch the hours tick by and finally concede to the night, washing my face, brushing my teeth and crawling into bed alone.
It is a world not many can relate to.  And most don’t understand.  As the years have gone on and more and more of my friends find themselves married, I can practically taste the frustration and judgement when they invite me and my husband over for dinner and I reply with well, we’re in season so I’ll be flying solo.  “But we won’t serve dinner til 8pm.  Surely you both can make it.”  “Not a chance,” I say, knowing we probably won’t get another invitation again.
Our weekends from August until December, and maybe even beyond that if there are playoffs, are spoken for.  “It’s just a game,” some will say.  “Can’t you miss just one?”  I miss plenty.  It’s pretty impossible to make it to every away game if you have children or any kind of outside responsibility.  But a home game?  Never.  I might have been drugged and sicker than I’ve ever been all last season, but on Saturdays you could find me in my seat screaming for a team I didn’t know existed the year before.  Do I miss out on other things?  Usually.  But I don’t ever see that as a sacrifice.  This is our life, and I’m happy for it.

So why do you do it?  I get that question a lot, like it’s just that simple.  Is it frustrating sometimes?  Sure.  Do I get lonely on occasion?  Absolutely.  Do I miss my husband when I spend no more than 10 conscious minutes with him in a week?  Definitely.  But he loves the game.  And I love him.  And I love this life, any football wife will tell you that.  I’m not married to a football coach.  I’m married to the game.  I’m married to the team.  And that’s pretty cool most of the time.

We get one life.  And if you spend it doing anything less than what you’re passionate about, what’s the point?  J found his passion and did literally everything under the sun to make that passion his career.  Witnessing that kind of determination is what gave me the motivation and courage to chase my own dream.

So no.  My marriage is definitely not traditional.  We don’t spend Saturday mornings sipping coffee and browsing the Farmer’s Market.  We don’t share stories about our day over dinner.  We don’t even see each other during daylight hours most days.  But when my husband can come home from working a 15 hour day with a smile on his face?  Totally worth it.

Bikini Too Teeny…or something like that

Bikini Too Teeny…or something like that

 (also used: Essie-Set in Stones & Sally Hansen Xtreme Wear in White Out)

Essie Bikini so Teeny: I have a love hate relationship with this polish.  I’ve had it forever.  And every time I’ve gone to wear it, I end up totally frustrated and give up.  This is probably the worst formula of a polish I’ve ever ever dealt with.  And that’s saying a lot.  And it’s not just my bottle, y’all.

With that said, once I finally got the freaking polish applied (we’re talking 3 coats, and each coat had to dry almost completely before the next of you’d have streak city) and totally dried (even with my beloved Seche Vite and not touching anything for a good hour, I still ended up with dents.  Side eye, BST…side eye), I do actually really love the color.  Sigh, the world we live in.

I know what you all are going to say.  It’s after Labor Day, release the vampy manis.  But y’all?  It’s still like a hundred degrees.  So we’re still rockin’ in summertime over here.

linked with: TNF

Some Heavy Stuff & Some Silly Things 9/4

She’s imperfect but she tries.
She is good but she lies.
She is hard on herself.
She is broken but won’t ask for help.
She is messy but she’s kind
She is lonely most of the time.
sara bareilles: she used to be mine
++ My head is a messy place right now.  We’ve reached the point in the season when I’m spending entirely too much time by myself, and it’s just hard, y’all.  I’m so thankful that he and I are able to lead this life where we both are living our dreams.  But sometimes you just need people, you know?  I’ve been talking to the dog a little too much.
++ It’s times like now, when my mind gets foggy and too full and I start over thinking everything, that I’m really thankful I started running.  Sometimes the right music and your feet against the pavement can really fix everything. 
++ I deactivated facebook again.  I was bullied talked into reactivating for the book launch.  And I get it, it can be a useful tool.  But oh, my gosh it’s just not for me.  Life seems a lot more complicated on that website, am I right?  
++ I’m proud to say that the giant cookie wasn’t totally consumed in one evening.  That’s willpower, y’all.  I was settling into bed last night when I heard the rustle of the aluminum foil.  The husband is not immune.
++ I’ve been dealing with some insecurities lately.  I’m not exactly sure where they came from, but I’m willing to bet they have something to do with how often we move and how many times I’ve had to start fresh.  I also think they might stem a little from the fact that I have to do so many things by myself without the buffer of my husband.  I’m hesitant to admit that, that I have insecurities.  But don’t we all?  I’m not sure there’s any real point here, but I just felt like putting it out there.  Maybe some of you are dealing with the same things?  I was so much more confident in who I was, what I wanted and what I liked when I was younger.  I think I might have gotten some things backwards here, haha.  This song says it all a little better than I can.  “When you’re all alone, by yourself, do you like you?”
++ To end things on a lighter note, I’m in the middle of trying out the Sally Hansen Miracle Gel polish.  You all know how I feel about the Revlon system.  I’m excited to see how this stuff wears and how many days I can get out of it!
linked with: Stuff & Things
August 2014 Favorites!

August 2014 Favorites!

Holy Freaking Cow.
It’s September.
::fires glitter cannon::
Let’s get into my monthly favorites, shall we?

1. Wet ‘n Wild Mega Length Mascara Okay.  This is a weird favorite.  And not one I ever saw myself including.  I have small eyes with oily lids and stubby lashes.  Everything smudges and/or flakes on me.  Waterproof or not.  And confession: I hate waterproof mascara.  This one came in a gift set that I got at Christmas (I wanted the discontinued shadow pallet in it, I didn’t care about the other stuff in the set).  Just out of curiosity, I pulled out this mascara and figured I’d give it a go.  As a daily mascara, it does okay.  It’s not going to pump your lashes into falsies, it’s just not.  But you guys?  This stuff doesn’t smudge on me at all.  I can apply it first thing in the morning, and I have zero cleanup throughout the day.  That never happens!  So yeah this $3 mascara is my new favorite. (It’s packaged in a purple tube now, but I’ve already bought a back up)!

2. Cover Girl Ready Set Gorgeous Fresh Complexion Foundation Foundation is another thing that I’ve just come to terms with not looking perfect on my oily skin.  But this exceeded my expectations.  I can’t even believe the finish it leaves on my skin.  It doesn’t look like I’m wearing anything yet it covers my scaring and blemishes so well.  It’s not heavy at all, and I don’t feel like there’s anything on my skin (and I’m picky about this).  The staying power on this is amazing, too.  It’s been boiling hot here lately, and this stuff even survived tailgating and sweating my brains out through a game!

3. Wet ‘n Wild Pearlescent Pink Blush This is an old favorite.  I actually smashed my old one months ago and was too lazy to do the alcohol trick to fix it.  After a while, I got tired of leaving powder in my wake, so I just stopped using it.  I picked up a replacement a few weeks ago and have fallen back in love.  Wet ‘n Wild blushes are notoriously pigmented so a little goes a long way, but this is a perfect dupe for everyone’s beloved Nars Orgasm.  And it’s $2.99.  Beat that.


4. Neutrogena On The Spot Acne Treatment I’ve mentioned before that I suffer from cystic acne (on top of regular acne.  Yeah, it’s a fun life I lead).  While there isn’t much (topically) that can be done to shrink those suckers, this stuff does help.  I’m not kidding when I say I had a tumor on the side of my face last week.  It was awful and so painful.  On top of upping my normal 3 mg chelated zinc intake to 6mg, I applied this stuff as often as I could daily.  In just a few days, the tumor cyst (which usually takes weeks to pass) was practically gone.

5. China Glaze Float On I’ll admit, I rarely paint my nails the same color within a month.  Sometimes even within the year (I know, I know).  I just get really excited to try different shades.  When this manicure chipped, I reapplied it.  I think that makes it my favorite polish of the month because I can’t tell you the last time I did that.


6. Baby Lips Dr. Rescue in Soothing Sorbet This is a perfect hint of color that pulls any look together while still moisturizing your lips!  This is something quick an easy to slap on sans mirror, too.  I know this is something I’m going to continue reaching for as we (please God) transition into the fall months!


linked with: Mia