This year has been about definition. Redefining, actually. From the moment I walked across that stage in 2008, I’ve just been wandering around aimlessly.
I’d lost my label. And I know I’m not alone in that feeling. When student is stripped from our name tag, we’re all left a little lost.
After last year (you know, the year that literally kicked my ass), I decided I was done. I didn’t like how things were going. I had a moment when things got so scary last year that I promised myself that if I were given a second chance, I’d do things differently. I’d be the me I wanted to be.
So 2014 came, and I took off running.
I set goals. I put my dreams down on paper and didn’t entertain the idea of them not happening. I was on the phone with a friend one evening and literally said I’m not even scared that it isn’t going to happen. I won’t let that happen. I just won’t stop until it does.
I’ll admit, I’ve never worked harder than I have this year. I’m not even just talking about the writing, I’m talking about it all. Running, learning to drive stick, facing my fears. I tend to try and then give up. Failing wasn’t an option.
The thing with giving up is this. It wouldn’t matter to anyone else. I wanted it. And if I gave up, I’d only be disappointing myself. I’d be left in the place I was when 2013 came to a close.
I was terrified of being the same person. I would actually get sick at the idea of being in the same place forever. I’d been in that limbo for too many years already. That place of wanting something but never having it.
I blamed the world. I saw people get the things I wanted and I’d actually hate them for it. Overnight success, it seemed. And then one day it just dawned on me.
I would throw myself into all of it. I’d commit 100% and just keep plowing forward. And when one thing was crossed off the list, I’d add another.
I’ve never felt like this before. Like I’m exactly the person I want to be. Like I’m doing exactly what I want to be doing. Like I can do the things I want to do. And you know what? You can too!
This year, I redefined myself.
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I love the determination evident here! It's so inspirational to watch someone else work hard and I love that about you! Keep it going, girlfriend! Your transparency inspires me also!
-Claire
http://www.fashionandfeathers.com
Well duh, silly girl! You CAN…and you HAVE. I am so proud of all that you have already accomplished this year. Way to let 2013 know it doesn't define you! Love you!
Love this. It's always encouraging to hear someone else's motivation and determination!
Good for you! Limbo sucks! Trying to figure out the next move to get out of it is hard as well. Glad you figured it out and are becoming who you want to be.
Love this post!! So happy to hear how you've changed your thinking this year!! I think it's so important to be your own motivator!!
Such a great post! I felt a little lost after graduating, and have been working really hard to improve my business and build the life I want. Sometimes you have no choice but to just go after it. You go, girl!
xoxo
Kat
Actually, I can! LOVE IT!!!!!!! And love this post! So inspiring to see someone going after all the things they want in life and just kicking fear to the side lines and getting it done! You rock!
YES YOU CAN!!!
Joey, what an inspiring post! Defining my goals and writing them down has been such a game changer for me!
You go girl! Loved this! And I totally agree with you that the transition from 'student' to 'real life adult' was a realllly hard one, so glad I'm past that time in my life!