For the sake of being real, Friday was a really, really tough day. I won’t go into details, but this whole adulting thing was just too much, and before I could convince myself not to, I broke down.
J was out of town, I came home and sobbed all of my makeup off. Sometimes a good cry just does the trick, but it wasn’t working. I couldn’t collect myself. Finally, I waved my white flag and sent out a message to the two girls who live on my floor.
Do either of you happen to be around? I could use some girl time.
That’s all I wrote. They were unaware of what’s been going on. And it was Friday night. They both wrote back immediately but before I could reply, they showed up at my door. With wine. They collected me into a hug and just let me sob without questions.
And though my insides were twisted up and my faith in God was wavering, I couldn’t help but take that moment as a sign. A reminder that He’s on this. He’s in our corner. Everything is happening according to His timing.
Being here is everything we hoped it would be, despite our troubles. And I was reminded that night that while some prayers aren’t answered quite yet, The Big Ones were answered. As I crawled into bed that night, I had a flashback to a night in Buies Creek when I felt so unfulfilled. So purposeless. So Alone. And I cried myself to sleep that night praying for a job and friends. That’s all I wanted.
It’s easy to lose sight of our blessings when we’re blinded by the big question marks. I was so focused on what we don’t have that I forgot about what all this is for.
Sometimes I still can’t believe we actually live here. And when I think about all of the tiny little pieces that had to fall together just right to make this possible, it’s hard not to believe. And I needed that reminder. Everything was such a mess for so many months; I’d forgotten what that felt like. I lost sight of the fact that mostly everything is worked out. I have so many answers that I didn’t have just a few months ago.
Over the weekend, things righted themselves. J and I took one huge collective breath of relief and things were pretty bright and shiny here on Sunday when he got home. And it was yet another reminder that while some things ebb and flow, it’s the people that matter. I am so thankful for the friends God planted here for us. I’m so overwhelmingly thankful for the family He hand picked for me to work for. And most importantly, I’m so thankful that my husband is also my best friend; someone I can always rely on without question. And those, my friends, are the true blessings.
Yes, yes and yes! Those friends are amazing to show up with wine right away. So glad you were able to get things turned around and I always love your perspective. Finding the blessings is so key and I'm so happy that so many things are going your way.
Amen girl! I'm sorry that you had a rough day on Friday but I'm glad that your friends were there for you. Sometimes you have to remember all of the good things in your life when you feel like that. Stay strong lady and I hope you have a great day today! 🙂
It's amazing that your friends showed up immediately with no questions asked, that's pretty amazing.
i am so happy that you are surrounded by your friends and that they were there for you in your time of need. i know how helpful that is. and of course, your husband. i know the feeling of wishing for something and you swear life will get better if you just have this one thing.. and then you get the one thing, and a couple months later you are feeling down again. of course, that is over simplification, but i'm glad you were able to look back and see how far you've come. hope things get easier soon love.
Love this, so true! I'm kind of in the feeling all alone with no friends phase (except for Adam, who I am truly thankful for!) and it's easy to focus on that and not on the blessings I do have. Thanks for the reminder to realize God's got this!
I'm glad you were able to take a step back and reflect and then, of course, see a light at the end of the tunnel. I hope things continue on an upslope!
Hate that you were in that pain, love that you have these sweet friends that clearly love you 🙂 THAT is really what it's all about isn't it <3
It looks like you've been blessed in many ways. That's good. I know those question marks and I've been there too. Its great when someone can just come over and comfort you at the drop of a hat. You are very blessed there. Hopefully things will continue to look sunny for awhile. 🙂 estherdavison@gmail.com
So sorry to hear about your breakdown — but sometimes friends, wine, and a big ol' gross, snotty cry (you know the kind I'm talking about) are all you need to bounce back. Glad you're back to your positive and insightful self, friend! I'm always here if you need me! 🙂
xoxo
Kat
I feel you. I'm in a rut and just at a major loss as to what to do. Give it to God, I've done that. Now I'm trying to be patient (TRYING) while waiting for His direction. Glad you are feeling good sweet Joey. xo Amanda
I love that you have found friends there who were there for you when you needed! That is the biggest blessing in life right there. I am glad things started turning around for you this weekend. I think we all lose sight sometimes of how truly blessed we are.
So glad to hear that you have such a tight-knit little community in your apartment and hope you're feeling much better today. I'm so ready to be back in Charlotte again… miss you!!
I hate to hear that you had this moment of doubt and you got upset, my sweet Joey! But I'm so happy to see you looking on the bright side again!! Life can just be overwhelming sometimes. Things hurt us, makes us cry, make us sad or mad, but there is ALWAYS hope! Makes my heart happy that you have found people to support you through this phase of life. XOXO
I'm so sorry you've been having a rough time. But what a beautiful reminder! Friends like that are rare…hold on to them tight!
I'm glad you found a bright spot / silver lining! Perspective is tough, sometimes. I really struggle with it, and it generally takes something SIGNIFICANT to snap me out of it. Thinking of you, sweet friend!
I'm glad you found a bright spot / silver lining! Perspective is tough, sometimes. I really struggle with it, and it generally takes something SIGNIFICANT to snap me out of it. Thinking of you, sweet friend!
I'm struggling right now and this post was such a nice reminder. Lots of love to you, friend. xo