Nah, nah, honey I’m good.
I could have another, but I probably should not.
I got somebody at home.
And if I stay, I might not leave alone.
Now better men than me have failed
drinking from that unholy grail
I’ve got her, and she’s got me,
and you’ve got that ass-
But I’ve kindly gotta be like
Oh baby, no baby, you got me all wrong baby.
My baby’s already got all of my love.
Let me first start with, no. I’m not drunk. And yes, I promise this will make sense and have a real point. This song is catchy. It’s one I find my self beat-bopping to. But it isn’t one I ever really bothered to listen to. Not the lyrics anyway.
But the other night I was running. And when this song came on, I was close to losing my groove. I wanted to quit, so I pushed myself to really listen to the lyrics and try to forget that I was running. 1) It worked. 2) I thought to myself…hmm. Yup. This guy is really on to something.
I am not poetic or even the most eloquent person despite what some of you comment down below. But what Grammer does with this song is very simply put into words what a real actual commitment is like.
Because here’s the deal. I’m not sure if this is common knowledge or not (I thought it was but…) when you find yourself in a committed relationship you do not become invisible and your eyes do not stop working. You are a human being. One whom someone else finds appealing enough to want to commit themselves to. And like with all things, if one person likes something, chances are someone else might too.
Your significant other will not be the only person on this planet you find interesting. They will not be the only person you find attractive. They will not be the only person who is interested in you. You might one night find yourself having a drink with your girlfriends and actually enjoying a conversation with someone else. And that’s okay.
Before you all get the impression that either I or my husband have cheated, the answer to that is no. But we also have no qualms about allowing (I hate using that word) each other to go out with our friends for an evening because we know to whom we go home to at the end of the night.
The thing is, being in and staying in a healthy, committed relationship takes work. You choose that person, sure. But you have to keep choosing that person. It’s not like every other person falls off the planet just because you accepted a ring from a guy. No. The world still keeps spinning, and you have to work to hold on to the one standing next to you. And despite how interesting or attractive you might find someone else, you have to make the choice to place your significant other before anyone else. Oh, snap. I didn’t mean for that to happen. And would you believe I actually loathe all these new fangled words the kids these days are using. I swear I only turned 29 on Monday, not 79. Whatever. I’m getting off topic.
What I’m trying to say here is that staying committed to one another isn’t just something that happens. It’s something you have to choose and continue to choose. You have to work at it. Some days it will be the easiest thing you’ve ever done. Others, he’ll have just pissed you off and some guy will be looking at you from across the bar and you’ll think to yourself…maybe. I promise that’s never actually happened to me, so husband please don’t have a panic attack, but you know that I mean.
No, honey I’m good.
I could have another but I probably should not.
I’ve got to bid you adieu
to another I will stay true.
Photo credit: NRP
I really like what you have to say about this.
Funny though, I have never seen the song in that light before (and I've paid attention to the lyrics). To me, the song says "I don't trust myself to stay here and talk to you". In my mind, I think "well, if you don't trust YOURSELF then maybe you shouldn't put yourself in those situations".
That's something cool about songs though. I think everyone can take something else away.
I'm with Jaelan I dont think I've really listened to the words of the song, but you better believe I just put it on to listen to and I'm happy to see it in a new light!! Marriage is a lot of work, but in the best possible ways… like you said someday are easy and some not so much, but the commitment is the realist thing ever! xo, Biana –BlovedBoston
I'm so 100% with you it's ridiculous. {Do I say that on a lot of your posts? I think I do.} Commitment is work and I don't think enough people understand that when they get into relationships and then we get affairs, divorce… yeah. Oh and your bae comment made me laugh so hard… sitting here at my desk by myself. I'm constantly throwing things like "bae" out at David because he haaaates that kind of fresh, high school lingo. I'm not really into it either but I just like to make him roll his eyes at me.
I love that… you have to KEEP choosing that person! Relationships are work and worth investing in. I love that you pointed that out and this song will most definitely be stuck in my head all day. It's just so catchy 🙂
Have you ever seen the video for that song? If you have not seen it, it is actually so cute and I think that you would like it. 🙂 While I've only been married for 4 1/2 years, and I don't have all of the answers, it is work. I was talking to one of my Starbucks friends (more on that another time haha) and he (don't worry, he knows about Chris and sorry but I'm not attracted to this dude) asked me why do people get married, and why did I get married. He didn't see the point in getting married because you can still have a life with someone and not be married. While that is true, I do kinda feel like it makes it easier for someone to walk away. But when you're married, the commitment and what is at stake seems bigger to me. I don't know. Anyways, sorry for the long comment lady. I hope that you are having a great week!! 🙂
I absolutely agree that you have to keep choosing that person, it's so important!
First off, I adore that picture. So cute. A couple weeks ago I listened to the words of that song and had so many of the same thoughts as you. I watched the video last night actually for the first time, too cute.
Great post! This is such a catchy song and it will now be in my head all day, thanks 🙂 I've listened to the words and thought along the same lines as you did. I was actually like good for you, you go home to your girl! It's so true, marriage does take work and it's not like some magical thing happens that once a ring is on your finger your eyes become blinders. It's those situations where you recognize you need to keep choosing your spouse and stay true to your love and commitment to them. ~Sierra Winks and Eyerolls
Love this post (and the song too)- it's so catchy!! But you're so right- Ryan always tells me when he gets hit on and that "he's still got it" (men… haha) but I never worry about him because the trust is there and I know we'll always have each other at the end of the day 🙂
I'm actually impressed I know what song you're referring to because I rarely listen to country music anymore, but I really like it– and I just went to watch the video- soo cute! But okay, I know that's not the point of this post, haha. I definitely was with Jaelan on thinking it was more about being one drink away from cheating, but I like your interpretation much better.
I've heard a lot of mixed feelings about this song… but I like your interpretation! I think it's a relatable thing for most couples. After all, we're only human!
xoxo
Kat 🙂
I dont think I have heard this song, but I am digging it. You are so right, commitment is about continuing to choose to stay with someone. I am with you on being careful using the work "allow" because some people's relationships are a bit constrictive and ridiculous. It always baffles me to hear some guys say, well I am not allowed to play video games anymore. Or I am not allowed to grab a drink after work because my wife says I have to come straight home. Like these are things Chris's friends tell him on a daily basis. I guess to each their own, but it is healthy to have a little bit of a life outside of a relationship to remain true to who you are, you know? I adore that picture of you two!
Love this so much, SO true! Adam and I were just talking about this, how we chose each other wen we said I do, but it doesn't end there. We choose each other every day.
I totally get what you're saying here (and I do agree with you), but man I hate that song. The tune, the lyrics, etc.
I was talking to two 30-something friends last week and it came on the radio and their point was it's like he's saying "No worries, babe, I won't cheat on you. That's how you know I love you. At least enough to not cheat on you. But that's at this place. Who knows about the next bar I go to." They're married with kids and that's their perspective and I'm probably more of an Andy Grammer "Fine by Me" person anyway.
However, it's worth noting that (showing my age here) I mentioned to some newly married 20-somethings that I'd given Scott a "hall pass" and they thought I was serious.
The way I knew that DG was the one for me was when he had no problem letting me go out with my girlfriends. It was important to me when we started dating that I maintain my friendships and have that alone time. However, we also instituted date night once a week. We do choose each other every day, which is important to remember. I love that I am still an individual while also having the best possible support person in the background. He's my #bae. 🙂 xo
I didn't want to like this song when it was first aired and now I sing my pop-loving heart out when it comes on.
i have never heard of this song lol but i totally agree with the point of the post. my husband and i talk about this all the time – we have never and will never cheat but we are human and we have eyes and it's not the end of the world unless you act on it. you know?
AMEN! Life would be easier if others would just drop off the side of the earth but unfortunately, that's not how it works! I think it's actually harder after you get married because it's important to not put yourself in a situation that could lead to something happen. And is that really what bae stands for? Like when high schoolers use it??