The Truth About Finding Balance
For true transparency, I’m writing this post on a Sunday. Sunday of a holiday weekend, no less. I’m catching up on work today because I was struck down with some serious cramps on Friday, the day I was meant to knock out all my content writing.
So instead of writing on Friday, I laid on my couch eating Thai takeout and caught up on last week’s Bachelorette episode.
That’s the thing about working for yourself that somehow confuses people. When people hear I work for myself I think they envision every one of my days being like Friday afternoon. When in reality, it took Myra threatening me to get me to shut down my computer and give up for the day. I so desperately wanted to go into the holiday weekend with my todo list completed, knowing if I didn’t, I’d be where I am today: catching up on work when everyone else is out playing.
Working for yourself is a series of choices. While we have the freedom to do whatever we please each day, we have to hold ourselves to a disciplined standard.
Of course I don’t feel like working some mornings when I wake up. I was knee deep in season 2 of How to Get Away With Murder last week, and it was like torture pulling myself away from the TV long enough to squeeze in a work day, but somehow I managed.
On the other hand, there are some evenings when I can’t turn off. J worked late one night last week, and it was only when my stomach started growling to the point that it actually hurt that I realized it was 8:30 and I hadn’t stopped working yet.
I had a nice groove going when we lived in Buies Creek. It was easier then, honestly. J worked unreasonably long days, and I was all alone in the middle of nowhere. The only way to keep myself occupied was to find projects to work on. I was wildly productive but lonely.
The reality is, while Myra and I have been hustling it out creating a dream job for ourselves, work is still work. And sometimes we just don’t want to do it. Someone wiser than me once said don’t get too precious about the work when asked how they achieved such success.
I think I get it now.
Some days the work looks dreamy, a day full of fun conversations with my business bestie and designing brands when other days the work is discussing our finances to make sure we don’t get taxed twice by it looking like we’re taking out dividends. I still don’t understand what I’m saying in that last sentence, and that’s what a good portion of last week looked like. I thank my lucky stars every single day that Myra is the CFO.
If I woke up each day and only functioned by the thought of okay, what do I feel like doing today, I’d watch a whole hell of a lot of Netflix and possibly get some writing done. I definitely wouldn’t send out any client quotes. I wouldn’t edit photos or spend half a day in illustrator fighting with a font. It’s not about what I feel like, it’s about getting the work done.
It’s getting done.
Bu I’m still figuring it out.
