I Still Like You
Hurdle after hurdle, this year keeps throwing twists and turns at us that should trip us up. I saw this image a few weeks ago, on a particularly hard day, and thought…yup.
But the truth is, the only real option is to just keep moving forward. It’s to the point now that when we hit a hurdle, J and I just look at each other, hold hands, and jump. We know what it’s all for. And no matter what the situation is, we have each other’s backs.
I get asked a lot about our marriage, our relationship. And the truth is, we’ve never actually had an easy go of it. From day one, things have been hard. A kind of hard that I’m not even sure I can articulate to you. The kind of hard that’s a book waiting to happen. But in reality, it was the best preparation for a happy, healthy, and strong marriage.
We joke sometimes that the one thing that was determined to destroy us only set us up to be indestructible.
We stand together, always. Our life is almost always chaos. We’re both constantly chasing after dreams, doing whatever it takes to make those happen. We’ve grown. We’ve changed. Every single day is different, producing some new unknown. And everything seems so damn scary almost all of the time. But it all seems possible with someone standing next to you, whispering in your ear the reminders you need to hear.
I’ve had this friend since I was thirteen. This boy who saw my future even before I could. The man who knew I’d become this woman, who practically pulled her out of me. The husband who taught me that I could do more, be more, have whatever I wanted, and helped me along the way. He’s stood by me, even when I wasn’t the best version of myself.
Failure is easier to swallow when you come home to someone who pushes you back out the door the next day, promising it’ll be better this time. And when it isn’t, they have ice cream waiting.
Life is hard, friends. And sometimes I think we have it harder than most (why? seriously, why?) but this hard life feels easy with him.
People ask me what to look for in a future spouse. They ask me but how do you know for sure? I’ll never understand why I’m the person these people ask; I know nothing about dating. I married the boy who sat behind me in 8th grade PE, who practically stalked me into dating him (who I then pestered into marrying me). But if I had to offer some words on the topic, I’d say to think about what could possibly be your worst day ever. Then think about the kind of person you’d want there with you in that moment. You’d probably want someone who could comfort you, listen to you, understand you even when you can’t say words. In my case, I wanted the guy who could make even my saddest heart laugh.
Find the person that even on your worst day, you can look at them and say you know, it’s lucky we still really like each other.
