by Joey | Aug 13, 2014 | Throwback
When I hear about someone suffering from mental health, my heart absolutely breaks. It’s something no one really talks about. It’s something that gets pushed under the rug. Be happy, people say. As if it were all so simple.
Being sad might be the most crippling of all the emotions. Can you imagine a sadness so great that it makes you want to disappear into nothingness? Imagine your worst moment, then imagine someone living in that state constantly. Could your heart take it? I know mine couldn’t.
I imagine my worst day. Despite the blur of tears, that day is so clear. My heart remembers the sadness so well that sometimes I have to remind it not to feel that way all the time. Because sadness doesn’t go away, it doesn’t. It’s something you carry with you forever, the difference is that we learn how to carry it. We learn how to let it exist without it defining our every moment. And if you’re lucky, you have people who help you carry it. I think that makes all the difference.
I pinned this image ages ago…
And I thought…how very true. How very tragic. To be surrounded by the wrong kinds of people. To allow people into our lives who do nothing for us but make us feel more lonely than before. And I thought how lucky I was to have this ever growing system of support. From people who hardly know me to people who actually love me.
If I’m being one hundred percent honest here, I was depressed in 2013. It was mild, but it was real. And for a person who is typically just happy, it was something I didn’t understand. A general sadness veiled my heart. I let life get in, and I couldn’t get it out. I was on the edge of a breakdown constantly. Life has a way of doing that to even the happiest of people sometimes. I’m not ashamed of it. I’m a strong person, but I wasn’t strong enough for 2013. I just wasn’t. But the thing is, I had people. I didn’t have to pretend. I didn’t have to keep up an appearance. I was sad. I was a kind of sad I’d never, ever known. And it was okay.
And then, finally, the sadness lifted. But all the while, I had people in my corner. They weren’t pulling or pushing. They were just there, standing with me, holding my hand. And it made all the difference.
If you are suffering in any way, please please don’t feel like you have to be ashamed. Please don’t let the world make you think it’s not okay. Because being sad is okay. And you don’t have to be strong all of the time. And there is a way out of the sadness, I promise.
1800-273-8255
